What brought you together?
What was it that brought you together, what were the circumstances, the people, and the events that were surrounding you when you met? What made it possible for you two to meet? Imagine if it was a scene from a movie, what would have had to take place for this moment to come together. What went into allowing love to take place? Knowing this is important because it helps you understand your relationship and what together, you are here to do.
Note for single friends: Use a past realtionship or an attraction you feel, this is about you learning about you, it doesnt have to be a romantic exchange only a powerful connection.
Make some notes.
We want to explore it without your everyday eyes, beyond the simple view that says; we met online, or in a bar, or at work, or however it was, we want to go deeper. Yes, that ordinary stuff is part of it too, but there’s more to this than just the ordinary stuff. You don’t want to miss the extraordinary too, the stuff that can tell you what you and this relationship are doing here. You want to know more about the stuff that can turn you and your relationship back on, and your relationship can help reveal who you are really here to be.
So imagine if you were writing a love story. Imagine that you were brought together because there was something that love needed to say. Imagine the universe conspired to bring you together, because it did. Now we need to know why and what for.
Now even if you came together through what you previously thought was a less romantic situation, like an affair, or you don’t think the way that you meet was romantic enough, then just forget that for a moment and without judgment explore the reasons you both came to be. Drop your old conceptions of what it was or could have been and explore how it was perfect just the way it was. That it was the only real way it could have ever been. That the universe conspired for you two to be, because affairs and drunken nights are love stories too.
However you came together, so-called “good or bad”, turn it into a love story, your love story, so that you can get into the mystery and unfold what love wants from you.
Okay, so there was something about the way you met that was extraordinary, let’s find out more.
Exercise 2
Your Relationship Myth (the story of you two)
*Please read this exercise or go straight to the audio with a pen and paper ready.
Notice the circumstances of how you met, your first encounter, how did you first meet? Don’t overthink it, initially just jot everything down whatever you can think of, good and the bad. Some of this will be the ordinary stuff too, it’s just to get it all down and reconnect to the experience of how you first met.
Now become a little blurry and drop your everyday self, let go of all your everyday concerns, just for now. Use the state you discovered in the Power Spot Meditation above to help you through. *remember your anchor to help you to easily get there.
Go to an early meeting, when life conspired to bring you together. What was the atmosphere like, what was it like around you? Was there an atmosphere or mood around you? Feel that atmosphere or mood.
Example: We met in a tiny tourist town, a place of travelers and backpackers. There was an atmosphere of people coming together, a mood of strangers getting to know each other and connecting.
What was your atmosphere? Go into that mood, what was the atmosphere trying to do, what effect was it trying to have on both of you?
Make a note.
Were there any other people who brought you together, or kept you apart? What were they doing, what did they see in both of you? Look at it as if you are writing a love story, what was their part? For a moment become them, look through their eyes and then look back at you. See this love story from their eyes; take a look from this view. Make notes about what you see.
How did you feel when you first met? Notice what it felt like, what was going on inside of you. Notice all the feelings in you. What did it feel like? Were you nervous or scared, excited or thrilled, did you have a quivering inside of you? Go to that time and just notice how it felt inside of you. What was this state inside of you trying to do? Maybe it was trying to wake you up or get you to make the first move, or get you to relax more back into you.
Example: The excitement inside of you just wanted to bubble up and allow you to finally express yourself to them.
Just take a moment, and explore this state, and make a note of what this state was trying to do.
Was there anything strange or unlikely about your initial meeting? Were there any coincidences or incredibly unlikely events that somehow brought you together? Become the energy of the strange and unlikely occurrences and notice what you are trying to do. Why is it that you want to bring them together?
Example: You met in the most unlikely place, imagine you were the force that had to work to make that meeting take place, imagine all that you would have to do. We met in the middle of Australia…imagine the forces that had to bring us together.
Make a note.
Was there anything you had to give up to finally meet? Was there anything you had to let go of so you could finally be together?
Example: You were in another relationship and had to give the old one up.
Make a note.
Was there something about your early days that you particularly loved?
Example: You really loved seeing each other, or just hanging out, or playing sport together.
Make a note.
Now use everything you have learned in this exercise, what you’ve discovered and turn it into a love story, write it in a way that describes how you were always meant to be, how your love was meant to be, begin to write your story in a completely new way.
This is the begining of Your Love Story that will continue to evolve. This step is so important, so we urge you to take extra time here to get the most out of your love story.
How could you bring this, this love story back into your relationship? How could this new story help you with any difficulties you may be having?
Make a note.
Bonus Podcast Episode
